Trick Or Treat? 13 Last Minute Costumes You Can Find In Your Apartment

You're broke, busy, or just not that into it but you need to pull together a Halloween costume for the party this weekend. I have found the perfect solution that is fun, easy, and nice on your pocketbook. Go to your closet, open those storage boxes, look under your bed and you won't believe what costume ideas may stem from this. I invited my neighbor over to see how many costumes we can come up with by only using items that exist in my apartment. The results were amazing, we found 13 lucky costumes in less than 20 minutes!

1. The Pool Boy - Think Flamingo Kid meets Country Club snobbery.

2. The Bartender - Grab your tightest black tee, grab some booze from your shelves, and you're golden.

3. Wind-blown - Grab your umbrella, ella, ella, and turn it inside out. Walk like you are fighting the wind as your hair is disheveled and your tie is wrapped around your shoulder. Best chance to win most original costume.

4. The Dog Walker- Have your treats be candy.

5. The Skier- Aspen style, naturally (as my closet may have one or two Argyle sweaters).
6. Bruce Springsteen - Get your date to dress up as Courtney Cox. You can make two cheap costumes and still get the laughs!

7. The Grandpa- Wait why do I have these clothes in my closet?
8. Burt Reynolds from the original movie "The Longest Yard"

9. The Baseball Player- Don't have the legs to pull off the Burt Reynolds look? Grab some sweats and go Sunday softball style.

10. The Hollywood Douchebag- Enough said!

11. A Television - Grab a box and throw a hanger on it as an antenna. Be careful 'cause this costume will make you look 10lbs heavier.

12. The Tacky Tourist - Again why are these clothes in my closet? And don't tell my neighbors I have binoculars.

13. The Mummy- If all else fails you hopefully have toilet paper in the house. Wrap it around your body and you will pass for a mummy, a Clan member, or a light bulb.

A good time had by all, and I assure you nobody was harmed during these shenanigans. You have no excuse now not to rally and pull together a killer costume for Halloween. Have fun and be safe! AND, Send me pics of you dressed in your costume. Best costume gets a $50 gift certificate to Olive Garden (that's right - bottomless bread sticks)! Send pics to theguyin2a@gmail.com. Happy Halloween!

Your Stupid Fart Joke For The Weekend

Bed, Bath and Beyond Beyond!

I had my 20% coupon in hand and needed to grab me some Brita filters. But this trip, I decided, was more then just a quick run; I was on a mission. I was in search of the answer to the riddle: What is the BEYOND at Bed, Bath, & Beyond? Well, you will not believe how BEYOND "BEYOND" they have gone. It was like a QVC commercial on crack from the moment I walked in the door!

Here are 5 items that are beyond any reason they are at BBB.

1. The Snuggie

First of all, I actually bought one of these last year for my Secret Santa gift and I will admit it was a big hit. In fact, it got traded for three times. However, once out of the box I realized how absolutely uncomfortable the Snuggie is. It’s 100% felt and 1000% flammable! Once the darling of the “As Seen On TV “ world, it appears that the Snuggie is yesterday’s news, so now you can take advantage of the $14.99 price break.

2. The Booty Pop

Ladies no need to pay those absorbent prices anymore at Victoria Secret. That’s right, your Booty can now POP like J-Lo’s. Put down those Spanks and feel sexy again with this latest sensation of ridiculousness. It’s all new, and sold exclusively at Bed, Bath, & Beyond: your go-to resource to accentuate all your curves.

3. Shake Weight FOR MEN!

Fellows I know what you’ve been thinking: Why do blondes have more fun? Well don’t worry guys now we can have all the enjoyment they get. That’s right, finally Shake-Weight for MEN. We can now jerk, vibrate, pulse, & sweat our way to bigger biceps and sexier triceps. Thanks Shake Weight for reading my suggestion letters :)

4. The Very Best Of Barry Manilow

OMG they actually have an entire rack of “mood setting” music for those special moments. And their feature artist is Barry Manilow! The buyers at Bed, Bath, & Beyond really made an amazing choice when they were thinking of just the right CD to put on when you’re trying to get the girl from the sofa to the bedroom. Nothing says sex then a little “Time In New England,” into “Mandy,” followed by a little “Copacabana” to close the deal.

5. Magic Hat

I couldn’t even make this stuff up if I wanted to! WTF, the Magic Hat sold at Bed, Bath, & Beyond? This one stumps me even more than Barry. The good news is it does come with a magic cape and over 200 tricks!!!

I really do think Bed, Bath, and Beyond is a great store for actual bed and bath products plus they have some awesome kitchenware too. However, the Beyond is just beyond my imagination. But, like Meatloaf says, “2 out of 3 ain't bad."

Guaranteed cheapest way possible to re-do your entire place

If you're just bored of your place cause you've been living there for awhile, but you're broke as a joke, try this quick fix: simply rearrange the furniture.

That's right, move that sofa to the other wall. Now, put your TV where your sofa use to be. Take that framed Ansel Adams picture you've had since college, and hang it in the bathroom.

When I was a kid I used to rearrange my bedroom all the time. I replaced my Michael Jordan posters with Cindy Crawford posters. (Um... I think those were the puberty years).

I remember taking down my bunkbed and pushing the two twin beds together, and all of a sudden I had a King sized bed. Only problem with that was now I had a big boy bed and was still trying to rock my Charlie Brown comforter. Seriously though, I know this sounds simple but you won't believe how much of a difference a few changes in your apartment can make.

Best Excuse For Why She Can't Sleepover

Funny Pictures | Funny but Weird Stuff

VITAL INFORMATION: Every Bathroom Tells A Story

You never know who may stop by unexpectedly, or whom you may bring home from the bars, so here is a checklist of the have's and have-nots for your bathroom. Call these pet-peeves if you wish but very useful info here!

DO's

1. Do KEEP IT CLEAN.

2. Do keep the seat down!

3. Do always have an emergency roll of toilet paper in the bathroom. It's an effin nightmare to get stuck in someone else's bathroom and run out of toilet paper.

4. Do have an extra toothbrush for an unexpected guest. Now this is a bit tricky cause you don't want to unveil a drawer filled with toothbrushes, as if you have a different trick every night sleepover. So make sure you have one extra but make it appear as if you bought a 3-pack and it's just the one you were going to use next.

5. Do always have a clean towel.

6. Do have potpourri, scented candle, or one of those plug-in glad fresheners *make sure you cross-reference with #6 below of the dont's.

Don'ts

1. Don't keep the toilet seat up!

2. Don't have any ointments out that read, "apply when itchy".

3. Don't have a moldy shower liner.

4. Don't forget to flush.

5. Don't have your Porno mags out.

6. Don't have matches out. The smell of a burnt match just says "wow, someone just took a big poop in my bathroom." Same applies to Lysol.

7. Hide your pills! Let them figure out in time you're a little crazy before they see the bottle of klonopin.

People will snoop so be prepared!!!!