VITAL INFORMATION: Every Bathroom Tells A Story

You never know who may stop by unexpectedly, or whom you may bring home from the bars, so here is a checklist of the have's and have-nots for your bathroom. Call these pet-peeves if you wish but very useful info here!

DO's

1. Do KEEP IT CLEAN.

2. Do keep the seat down!

3. Do always have an emergency roll of toilet paper in the bathroom. It's an effin nightmare to get stuck in someone else's bathroom and run out of toilet paper.

4. Do have an extra toothbrush for an unexpected guest. Now this is a bit tricky cause you don't want to unveil a drawer filled with toothbrushes, as if you have a different trick every night sleepover. So make sure you have one extra but make it appear as if you bought a 3-pack and it's just the one you were going to use next.

5. Do always have a clean towel.

6. Do have potpourri, scented candle, or one of those plug-in glad fresheners *make sure you cross-reference with #6 below of the dont's.

Don'ts

1. Don't keep the toilet seat up!

2. Don't have any ointments out that read, "apply when itchy".

3. Don't have a moldy shower liner.

4. Don't forget to flush.

5. Don't have your Porno mags out.

6. Don't have matches out. The smell of a burnt match just says "wow, someone just took a big poop in my bathroom." Same applies to Lysol.

7. Hide your pills! Let them figure out in time you're a little crazy before they see the bottle of klonopin.

People will snoop so be prepared!!!!

Would You Rather? Decorating Naked

Would You Rather Paint Your Bathroom Naked With Bruce Vilanch Or Wallpaper Your Bathroom Naked With Precious?

The Case for Bruce Vilanch: With a wardrobe of over 5,000 t-shirts, we could probably save some money by using them as tarps while painting, so choosing him could come with some added benefits. However, painting is extremely tough and tiresome, and if you parlay that with the image of him shouting, "X gets a Square" while naked in my bathroom, it makes him a tough choice. On the other hand, wallpaper has become as trendy as Precious, and is much easier to do than before. Although the bathroom is going to be a tough squeeze for the two of us, wallpapering is best to do in a smaller space. So Precious, as your girl Mariah Carey would say, "Touch My Body" cause I'm choosing you! I'm looking forward to seeing how the wallpaper comes out.

So if you agree, here's a wallpaper store in the Valley that has thousands of choices and is a total hidden gem. We promise that it's worth the drive to the Valley.

Don't forget to check back every Friday for more of Would You Rather?